Almost Emotionless
by CharlotteMShadows
Summary: (Revised). Lucy is left abandoned and alone. She is ready to let go of everything. Will she hold on to her hope? (Rated T for darker themes). One-Shot.


I walked threw the guild doors feeling sad and alone. The guild started ignoring me after Tenrou Island and I'm not sure why. I felt a little lonely when Lisanna came back from Edolas but that was over in weeks, the reason for ignoring me now is something different. Something I don't understand. Is it because I'm weak? My magic isn't helpful for them?

I sighed, sitting at a shadowed table in the corner of the guild. The people ignored me, they didn't seem to care. My friends had promised to stay with me, all the guild promised. Fairy Tail has broken my Trust. It's been wasted on them. I don't want it to be broken again, I can't spend hours trying to pick up the shards and only have my fingers cut. So I'll leave my trust, abandon it the same way they abandoned me.

_Anger._

I looked around again, eyes lingering on each and every person. Laughing and talking with one another. I used to hate them for this, but now I just feel empty.

Sadness.

Truthfully, I don't even feel sad anymore. There's no reason to feel sad. They're not my family, not friends, barely acquaintances. We're strangers, and don't matter to each other. I don't care.

_Pity_.

Is there any point in pitying myself for it? It doesn't matter one way or another, because I won't. I don't pity myself, pity makes you feel weak. I won't pity anyone else, either. Never again.

_Pain_.

I don't feel the sting of their betrayal anymore, the pain is gone. I don't feel the pain of fighting or training. Internal pain, external pain, it's all the same, isn't it? The bite of cold winds, burning hot drinks, bruises, cuts, heartache, it doesn't matter. I don't feel it. It can't consume me if I'm numb.

_Fear_.

Numb to everything, really. Why be afraid? When I'm battling, I don't fear the monster, demon, or dark mage. I only feel a sense of duty to rid it from this world. Helping people, It's the only thing to do.

_Disgust_.

I am not disgusted by the people I help. Even when poor, sick, dirty. Whether they are dressed in rags, living on the streets or wear fine silk and jewelry, living in a palace, it doesn't matter to me. All people need help, it's my duty to help them.

_Surprise_.

I'm not surprised by the strange requests and odd people I meet. I'm not surprised by a monster, by a wound, by the sick or poor, by betrayal, not anything. I've come to expect the unexpected.

_Indignation_.

Battles aren't fair, people aren't fair, life isn't fair. So I'll just toss away my Indignation, my sense of fairness. I'm not afraid to fight dirty, either.

_Pride_.

Pride is useless when you have no reason for it. I fight monsters, I don't impress anyone. I'm hired for dirty work, I can't afford to hold up my pride. Why care what people think of you?

_Shame_.

For that matter, I'm certainly not ashamed. I get the money, don't I? I satisfy the customer. I get the job done. Though I occasionally have to force them, we hold up our end of the deal and part ways.

_Companionship_.

I don't make friends with them. I just do my job. I look around at the guild one last time before heading out. They certainly aren't my friends, I do not love them, and I don't feel happy. It's gone. The bond has broken. We're strangers, as if we never knew each other in the first place.

The last time I see them, the last time I step through those doors, I feel a tingling on my hand, in my skin. I look at it. My mark has faded. I'm no longer a member of the Fairy Tail guild, and still, I don't care. I hoist my bag over my shoulder and board the train without a second thought.

It was dark out now. I heard the thunder pound, the sky about to rain down at any moment. The train arrives soon and I step off, quickly walking in the direction I wish. The graveyard. My mother and father lay waiting for me.

I sigh, sitting down with my legs tucked beneath me. I felt so lonely, so very alone. There wasn't a soul alive that would care about me, and my soul will never care for another. Is this how it is? Truly, I'm never to live again? Just walk around, an emotionless shell, to keep working automatically until I make a mistake someday? I looked up to the sky with dull eyes, tears beginning to slip down my face as the sky lost its last bit of light.

I'm losing hope. I didn't think I had any hope left, but I could feel it slipping away, washing away with my tears. I let my head bend down, my hands clasp together. They were shaking. In this position it almost felt as if I was praying, what a joke. I choked on a bitter laugh, how ironic. I stayed there for a while before I finally stood up, ready to begin a new and terrible life. Something prevented me from doing this, when suddenly, I felt a pair arms wrap themselves around me.

_Confusion_.

I stood, frozen. I felt this person's warmth seeping into my back. The person whispered into my ear, "It's going to be alright. _I_ care about you."

_Hope_.

My eyes widened, I felt as if these words alone had sent ripples through my body. I turned my head to face my savior. His own red eyes gleamed with happiness, happiness that seemed as if it was for _me_. His soft smile and warm eyes made me start to feel. He was happy, happy to be with _me_. With that sudden realization, I turned around completely, hugging him tight as all different emotions flooded through me and made me feel so _alive._ His black hair tickled my face. "Don't worry. I won't leave you." My lips curled themselves into a smile with him.

Lightning lit up the sky, and thunder crashed again. It urged me to do what I so desperately wanted to do. I cried.

I cried for so long, gross sobs and fat tears spilling from me, loud cries escaping from where I buried my face in his chest. He comforted me, supporting me until my whimpers faded away. So there we sat, hugging in the rain, feeling happy to have found each other.


End file.
